Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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