JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize