I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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