I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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