You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Randomize