Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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