So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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