Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
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