I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize