yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
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We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
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don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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