I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip ๐๐๐
Your skills amaze me
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
If sex isnโt mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, Iโm not interested...
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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