office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
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wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
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Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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