She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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