CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize