If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize