the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
you had me at cake vodka
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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