Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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