I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
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There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
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I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
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