i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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