If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize