is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
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