yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I'm determined to sit on that face.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
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