I showed him my bush... on skype.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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