I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize