I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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