I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
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I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
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Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
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