i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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