..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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