i'm signing you up for texting rehab
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
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