I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize