HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize