When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
did you just send me my own nude
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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