totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
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