Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize