she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
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Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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