wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize