Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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