Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize