It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
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I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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