Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I need to calm my uterus...
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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