he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize