One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize