So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize