Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
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It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
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Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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