Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
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