i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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