She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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