Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize