Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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