I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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